Last week, I wrote a piece about something called a “Food Cubby,” which ensures all the food on your grown-ass woman plate doesn’t touch. Some 9+ million of you saw the piece, and about 100,000 more had something along the lines of “who tf needs that” to say about it. Well, fam. I do.
OK, well, I don’t anymore, because as an adult who doesn’t like it when her carbs touch her greens and her greens touch her protein and her condiments touch any of those things, I make a conscious effort to place everything separately on my plate to my liking. As a kid who reaaaallllllllly didn’t like it when anything on her plate bumped up against another thing, I would’ve loved to have had it.
Plenty of people commented on the original post curious about why someone would have an issue with their food touching—others were straight-up mean about it (“this is for parents who don’t discipline their children”). Then came the influx of people who just can’t stand when their food mixes all up together. No reason. They just can’t stand it. And they far outnumbered the people being rude about a set of little silicone half-moons that have no impact on their lives at all whatsoever.
It’s unclear why I should have to pinpoint why the sight of mac and cheese-tinged string beans makes my skin crawl or at what point my parents knew I just wouldn’t eat my mashed potatoes if my gravy was anywhere near it. To this day, my husband knows I won’t fux with a cheeseburger that’s brushed up a little too close to potato salad or fries, and, again, this is not a trait of mine I feel I should have to defend. It’s not about being picky. I loved—and still love!—to eat all of those things, sure. But not when they touch. Nope. Never.
That said, I’m excited to hear what you think of me when you read this, @ millions of you! I can’t wait to hear how you think I’m immature for being skeeved out by salmon juice-soaked rice (uuuuuugh), how you’re actually lol-ing at my contempt for eggy toast (ooooooof), and how you’re dyinggggg over how ketchup juice rolling into anything makes me want to cry a little bit. I’m pumped.
Really! Say what you will about whatever anxiety and/or food-overlapping childhood memory stuck hard enough with me to do this. I will just buy more Food Cubbies and move on with my pristine food-filled day.
…But please do be cognizant that there are myriad reasons people really, truly can’t stand to have their different foods touch—ASD, sensory processing issues, and OCD among them.
I guess that means this has become just another rant imploring people to be kinder to each other on the internet (which, hahaha, OK). But it’s also one insisting you leave people tf alone when they just want to eat their food the way they want to eat it.